Shockingly Obama was in my dream last night. I have no idea why.
Basically, I was up at my grandmother's home in Maine for a classic family gathering (all of my dreams of late have taken place at odd family gatherings in either the Vineyard or Maine. My background is sickening.)
I say hello to my grandmother, who thinks I am my brother and that my younger brother is me, but this isn't a sign of senility but rather of a kind of twisted and powerful new logic that is beyond me. I am led to understand this gradually.
Then I am off on a boat, sailing through the harbor of the town. Obama is along for the ride, and we are debating whether he should stick around Maine for a while, you know, relax after the long campaign. I'm all for this option.
But he's like "Maybe I should go to New York, you know, and start working on things." I'm like: "I just came from New York. Trust me, you don't want to visit that teeming cess-pit. It's hot, it's awful. Don't even get me started." He's like "Got it."
We sail the harbor with a remarkable, Flight of the Navigator like speed, seemingly gliding across the water without touching it. It is glorious, and Maine's rocky, glacier carved coast is resplendent in the autumn afternoon.
Suddenly we are in a classroom. Apparently Obama has a teaching gig at the University of Maine Orono. He seems to be teaching some variety of civics, and I am in the class, desperate to seem smart. So very desperate!
In the back corner of the room there is a very intense Arab-looking student, who has some very pointed opinions about American government. Not very favorable opinions, in the nature of things, and he seems especially eager to slam Obama's pro-America rhetoric. Obama is all like "Look. That's fine. But it's dead wrong. Could not be more wrong."
Nevertheless, I am struck by how intelligent and ardent the student is. He is clearly much smarter than I am, and however radical his ideas are, it seems that Obama knows this also.
Strangely, we are then back in the cabin of the boat for Obama's office hours, where I say something to the effect of "Oh, isn't the Arab so smart? Much smarter than me." And Obama says: "Smarter than you? Perish the thought! That crazed egomaniac is another Hitler in training, don't worry about it. He's being taken care of..."
I see the Arab in the hall, and I'm like, "You aren't going to ruin this for me. I've passed on taking this class three years in a row, and no way is your radical ideology going to wreck my enjoyment of it."
And the Arab is like "What the fuck are you talking about?"