Untapped Spring Break Hotspots: Pitcairn Island
In honor of Spring Break which I am celebrating (where else) New Haven, I thought I would take some time to profile a few of the destinations you WON'T be seeing on MTV this year, but which are nonetheless equally hot as far as the party scene goes. Take Pitcairn Island. At first glance, this remote island with a population of about 50, most of whom are Seventh-Day Adventists, wouldn't seem like the haven for young-person debauchery that it actually is. But the truth is right there in the peoples' origins; many of the inhabitants are descendants of the mutineers from the famous "Mutiny on the Bounty" who settled the island after stumbling upon it in their flight from the British Navy.
This place is bumping, and if you're worried about any annoying natives getting in the way of your partying, fear not, the Aborigines left long ago.
No, the only inhabitants are descendants of Fletcher Christian (and the Taitian women he abducted and brought with him), the charming figure to the left who was portrayed by Mel Gibson in the 1984 film The Bounty, which also stars Anthony Hopkins, Liam Neeson, and that spry poet's offspring, Daniel Day-Lewis. A fine film.
Another major draw of Pitcairn for some will be the opportunity for elicit, ritualized, traditional sex with underage girls, a tradition islanders claim dates back to the original Bounty Mutineers. If they base all of their laws on the actions of the original mutineers I hope they are ready to accept murder, as most of the sailors and Tahitian men in Fletcher's band killed each other (or succumbed to excessive drunkenness) in the first few years of the settlement. When American whalers "rediscovered" Pitcairn in 1808, only John Adams of the original eight sailors was still alive, along with several Tahitian women and children. You can tell this place is ideal for a party, right?
Another drawback is Pitcairn's relative isolation. The nearest islands are hundreds of miles away, and Pitcairn is only accesible via passing cargo ships. It took author Dea Birkett two years to book passage, arrange for an island home-stay (there are no hotels), and receive permission from the British Government to visit the island (for the secret purpose of writing her book,Serpent in Paradise. But come on, is that really gonna stop us from partying hardy on Pitcairn this spring break? Hell no!
There is good news afoot, the Pitcairn men have lost their appeal of the rape charge, so those Pitkearners are ripe for some fresh blood! Join me, I've already booked us seats on a Czech freighter, what could be better?
Posted by Nostradamus at 1:30 PM