Nosferatu: Welcome to the first ever intra-Death/Media interview segment. This weekend I had a chance to sit down with Nostradamus Marquis, who recently retired from blogging and then just as shockingly returned with both a new post and long comment on Finnegans Wake. Nostradamus, thank you for being here.
Nostradamus: It’s good to be home, Nosf.
Nosferatu: Why the retirment?
Nostradamus: The blogosphere seemed like it was on the wane. Mulatto Jesus was a nice new site, but Actual Rod hadn’t updated consistently for months, Actual God was still brilliant but rarer than caviar, and though the rise of Al at Delino was enjoyable, something of the spark was gone. Then I read Finnegan’s now infamous Johnston post and realized something fundamental. Though I myself was only bound to Yale by my diploma and my job as a litter-bearer for a certain mercurial professor, I was still interacting for the most part with people deeply enmeshed in the trials and tribulations of undergrad life. Finnegan’s post made me realize, for the first time, that my life in the blogging world was completely fraudulent. It was then that I decided to retire.
Nosferatu: Intersting. Some have speculated it was the influence of a certain woman in your life, a woman who, how shall I put this, despises blogging as an infernal sap on your energy and time. What of this?
Nostradamus: There is no truth to that. Really, it was just realizing the connection between Finnegan’s seriousness as a thinker, and his seriousness as a blogger… Something inimitably dark occurred to me, as my eyes were drenched by the radiant light of Finnegan’s Google Adsense Ads… I had to stop.
Nosferatu: But now you're back?
Nostradamus: Yes. I have recently been thinking a lot about Terri Schiavo again. I can’t escape it, and (many are familiar with this) the thought of Terri is for me the thought blogging. Without it, I can have no fresh experiences of her. My imagination seems to shrivel into a sun-dried raisin with regards to her when I don’t blog… Also this is the worst time ever for Bush and Co, so how could I resist taking my shots with all the rest?
Nosferatu: What about, and this is a touchy subject, the Nosferatu identity?
Nostradamus: Well, as you know, back when I began this enterprise, in the spring of 2005, I would often vary my commenting names, sometimes modulating from Nostradamus to Nosferatu without warning. I intend to continue in this way. After all, our interests are entirely divided, and we each will have fresh and sometimes contradictory things to say.
Nosferatu: That’s for sure. Well, that’s all the time we have. See you in the funny-pages.
Nostradamus: One more thing. Arlo Harshenstein has had his say for the last time. I found his attacks, particularly his attacks on Delino, Hidden Hand, and Lester, to be disgusting and despicable. That kind of behavior will no longer be tolerated.
Nosferatu: I mean it. We have to go. Breaking news... Rosa Parks has passed away. More on this developing story soon.